Building consensus amongst Youth

Young people who are generally intelligent wish to express their individual opinions on a subject. The fault is they are usually unable to listen to the opinions of others which differ from their own. In that sense they tend to be very narrow minded and not open to hearing other opinions, even though at the same time they are fickle and are able to switch allegiances in a moment if their wishes are not fulfilled with the first interaction.

So how does one deal with this dichotomy? It is easier to first explain that there are divergent opinions and that we must make an attempt at least to understand why other people have them and try and look at the issue from their perspective which may differ significantly from ours.

It is important at that stage to reason, why one holds one’s own opinion so that one can back one’s statements with reasoning, which may not find acceptance with others, but which nevertheless is a belief one holds due to one’s own rationale. One is then able to build on that belief with facts and be able to defend it without fear or hesitation, further strengthening the case within one’s own mind and perhaps convincing others of its merit.

It is through reasoning therefore that one can expect others to convert to your opinion. In this was you are able to gain credibility and a following which will enable you to strengthen your base and build up your case in areas of doubt and debate.

Only then can one build consensus, in taking positions in finding agreement on matters of concern for youth, be it in a political party, a club or even a charitable venture as they all require considerable debate before agreement is reached preferably unanimously but otherwise through consensus with a few dissenters, as is sometimes inevitable in some important issues.

This will assist a young person in communicating with the older set as well and show the power of youth in important decisions. I do believe that in time youth can take automatic leadership if they are able to compromise and build a consensus at the same time, as it shows maturity, which is important when one takes up responsibility especially in a managerial situation, where one has to play a delicate game with different parties, all tasked with carrying out objectives of the institution. When one is more able to deal with differing objectives, it is easier to manage and build consensus with others.

Market yourself into a career

I read a speech given my a Mr Wickremage I think his name was the Marketing Director of Ceylon Biscuits Group, who from humble beginnings worked his way to the top of the career ladder and along the way garnered some prestigious international marketing awards to boot.

There was a lot of telling advice for youth that I thought relevant enough to note here, and hopefully inspire some of you to take on a career in this field. Sales and Marketing are fields that were in great demand in the past. Many found that if they were able to join at the bottom, their competence and ability if proven, will definitely take them right to the top, and Mr Wickremage was one who believed, and achieved the goal set for himself.

It is a unique career path that helps you to move from different companies and rise up, by sheer performance. Sales and Marketing are skills, rarely learned at University. So they generally do not hire Graduates as the outlook and expectations of graduates are very different to the rough and tumble of a marketing personality. The latter however pays a lot more than what a graduate can earn, and that is purely by effort and hard work equals reward.

While sales and marketing are different avenues, they are closely related and often training is required in both as they are complimentary. I was surprised when it was noted that youth today shun this field and they find fewer applicants choosing this field by choice. It is an indication of the expectation of instant gratification of youth today.

A good salesman can sell insurance one day, and banking products the next. Spare parts maybe later, and then pharmaceuticals, before moving on to FMCG products. It is all part of the variety of sales, and in the US sales professionals sometimes earn more than the directors they work for as their remuneration is mainly in the form of commissions on sales they make.

There was one telling passage in his speech. It was that he said we must never tell youth today, that we started at the bottom and climbed the greasy pole over decades to get to the top. Young people cannot think as far as a decade. They want to know what they can achieve in the space of a year, and if we are able to fulfill those expectations, we will be able to work on a successful relationship in a job. Rarely do sales people at the start stay on in one company for more than 2 years. So it is important to sell it short term.

Commitment to a Cause

A young person is guided in his outlook by those he associates with most. They are usually his circle of friends. Often after leaving school, they go together to classes, vocational training or even for jobs where they like to be with known people.

Similarly whilst in employment, it is good to join a cause one is interested in and take it seriously as it is both good to take one’s mind of work, and also to interact with other people outside of one’s employment.

Youth take up a sport or an activity of personal interest like, singing, dancing travelling photography and the like. A well rounded individual has other interests outside of his main employment. Religion is also one of them, especially if it is followed in a deeper and more committed level to the majority of people who just follow their religion as a matter of reaction.

I put politics into this area too. If one has strong beliefs in how one can change the status quo and is not happy with the state of things, one can pursue a political agenda. Firstly get into a role in your area, where you can show leadership and be recognized in the party as one who shows promise.

In order to do all these activities one has to be committed and be prepared to sacrifice a combination of time, money and determination to succeed. This is rewarding but unlike instant gratification that is usually the order of the day, it takes some time to achieve the reward one expects.

In that role, the word ‘what is in it for me’ must always be at the tip of your tongue as otherwise you will not commit. Much of the above, results in a level of sacrifice, which is not rewarded by a pay check unlike a job. It is important therefore to realize it and allocate time and effort in order to achieve this goal. It is easier if there are more friends or colleagues to work with together which makes it easy to attend the various meetings or sessions or practices. Remember that the reward at the end is based purely on the effort put in. It is important that the leaders give leadership, to encourage the youth to achieve them, knowing full well that there is a responsibility to provide the prizes at the end of the road, if successful. That is why there are financial and other incentives once the goals are attained and the winners are recognized. Remember the greater the effort the greater the potential reward so it is important to keep it all in perspective. 

Are you Generation Z or A? Take your pick!

People born into a different period are classified as Baby boomers, Generation X and Y. I have yet to see the Z word used and I wonder if the A word is more appropriate. The reason being that for the first time in History this emerging generation will have fewer people in their respective age groups in most countries as compared with the age group before them.

That creates a whole new series of problems. Remember the one child policy in China. It has now been in place for nearly 30 years give or take few. The majority of those in China under 25 are only children. The Chinese allowed some of their minority communities to have more children! I am not sure of the exact reason, but they would not be a threat to the majority community.

So to put it mildly they have a problem. A generation of spoilt brats! They have been given everything by their doting parents. The Government has realized that there is a huge social problem arising from this policy.

They have an army of 500 scientists, therapists and child psychologists studying this problem, so that they could come up with a recommendation. It is likely that as a result of this policy and the apparent demographic shift that will suddenly create a declining population when the present 50 somethings die, they will SHORTLY decide to do away with this policy and allow at least two kids in a family.

So now you are talking even after the Chinese have planned a shift, what are we doing? Do we have a plan for our youth? No. So the youth seize the time, make your plans and inform our government what you want for your generation. Is it pensions? Is it to put your parents into homes? Is it to stop work and let your parents create the income stream for you now so when they move on you can sit on you back sides and live happily every after?

These are all moves to contemplate while you are waking up. It is the first time you can take all the decisions for yourself. No one need intervene. If you muck it up too, no one will come to help. In that scenario what action to take is up to you. So first arm yourself with the tools of thinking, of reasoning and of evaluating your options. Do not look to the elders to come up with that rationale as they are unable even to contemplate the changed circumstances that you find yourself in. Only then can you make this choice which will determine your future course of life and prosperity. Good Luck! 

Sri Lanka Youth – Rio+20

 

Rio 20+ is the United Nations Conference on Sustainable Development, currently being held in Rio De Janeiro, Brazil (June 2012). Sri Lanka has sent the largest official delegation of all delegations in the world! That is the Govt. delegation taking advantage of using a Sri Lankan Airlines plane for which the monthly leasing cost exceeds over US$300,000, costing over $10,000 a day, just to keep the plane on the tarmac not counting maintenance charges. The example of a wastage and huge carbon footprint will not be lost on the world!

On top of that there is an NGO presence of various people and media personnel. It is a very important conference, but in the end the decisions taken by them, may or may not be acted upon by the various governments.

The Original Rio 1992, which is being commemorated this year came up with principles of sustainable development which have barely been touched upon. As far as Sri Lanka is concerned these 20 years have resulted in a level of environmental degradation that has been unprecedented and in the last 5 years it has increased at an exponential level.

The lead of politicians who are involved in this degradation, does not give a chance to either the Central Environmental Authority (CEA) or the Ministry of Environment to act on the powers vested in them.

I need not go through the individual items here. As far as the youth input here is concerned I take an extract which is self explanatory from Beyond Borders, a blog in the Sri Lankan blogosphere published today.

The statement that encapsulates several vital areas in sustainable development was drafted by over 30 youth-led and youth-focus local organizations that are involved in environmental conservation, management, climate change, sustainable development and advocacy for environmental issues. Bringing these organizations together and orchestrating Sri Lanka’s participation in the Rio Summit, is the Youth for a Greener Sri Lanka (YGSL) that was established earlier this year (March 2012). The statement is a position paper on which future projects will be based.

A large team of local environmentally conscious youths has formulated a multipronged action plan, addressing several key areas that are intrinsic in the development of a nation. Top of the list and under the umbrella of youth policy positions, the statement mentions society’s role in sustainable development. The activists believe that equality is essential, they explained “our aspiration is equality for all, and not the luxury of the 20 per cent of the world’s people who enjoy the exploitation of 80 per cent of its resources.”

Well-being and happiness as well as right mindfulness were also highlighted as the cornerstone to sustainable development. Society being at the heart of development, even with an extraordinary physical plan, it cannot fruition sans the right mindset of the people.

The economy is another key area that needs to be addressed, and therefore, the team included environmental sustainability and poverty reduction, and a Green Economy in the statement. YGSL explains, “A Green Economy should replace the current economic order of inequity, destruction and greed. A Green Economy should be an economic system that ensures social equity, protects the ecological balance and creates economic sufficiency. The core idea of a Green Economy should be to enforce sustainability, specifically the wellbeing of all people and respecting and preserving the biodiversity of Earth’s ecosystems.

On that note they believe it is necessary to establish an office for the ombudsperson — high commission for future generations. “We the youth representatives of Youth for a Greener Sri Lanka understand that there is a lacuna in current decision making processes and institutions of the world, especially as all of them fail to consider the long term effects of decisions made today. The proposal stated at paragraph 57 of the Zero Outcome document calling for the establishment of an Ombudsperson/High Commissioner for Future Generations is thus an opportunity to meet this short coming and by establishing such an office, we believe that both the aspirations of youth and future generations will be protected.”  From  www.beyond borders.wordpress.com  June 22^nd 2012.

The Above extracts from the blog entry are noble principles of expression of Sri Lankan Youth who I believe are more aware of the environmental issues than many adults, but do not see a positive way they can contribute and make a difference to the cause of sustainability.

I believe that along with these themes, we must set up a training program that is part of the school curriculum that covers the principles of sustainability over a one week period, which is uniformly taught by a roving team on say an environmental bus, run on renewable energy!! In this way there is consistency of the message and the attendees get a certificate of attendance and a pledge to protect the environment.

We must involve youth in an active program that they can see after being made aware of the issues from such so that they are fully armed with the rationale and basis that will carry them throughout their lives and who by living by example will teach everyone of the importance of sustainability as a method of spreading the message throughout the island in a practical manner. I have found that no amount of talking can substitute for an act of doing such as recycling waste as just one example of what we can do at home. In the latter case I believe Sri Lanka is seriously lacking in insight.

Don’t Complain – learn to get what you want in a subtle manner

I wish to concentrate on collective issues and not on personal matters. Young people are famous for believing they are entitled to something. I don’t know what it is that gives them this, but it may have something to do with the way they are brought up, and possibly parenting issues of this century. With an average household not having more than two children, parents seem to dote on their offspring who grow up spoilt, and worse, if one parent works overseas, they send money, thinking that it would compensate for the lack of love and affection.

Growing up in this environment, they are less able to fend for themselves, and have not been thrust into the wider world, at an earlier age, which many of their parents had to due to circumstances that were different.

Do not forget that in a generation our GNP per capita in US $ terms has grown tenfold since the 1977 opening up of the economy. No one remembers the queues for basic items then. It is a vastly different world that we live in today, with almost anything available, though at a price, which a whole new middle class seems to be able to afford.

They now grow up in a world of SMS dating, Internet and Mobile phones, none of which their parents were exposed to. This fast life almost gives them an arrogance that they are from a different era that permits them more freedoms than that afforded to their parents.

This results in wanting things that even their parents cannot reasonably without tremendous sacrifice give them, the latest craze being motorbikes as that is what draws the lasses. With the increase in duty adding another Rs 100K to the price of a new one, their requests must become reasonable and they must work for these basic needs and not expect to be handed them on a platter. What is hard earned in maintained, appreciated and used carefully and it is a generation that understands thrift that is needed once again, if we are to face some of the real pressures of life.

Growth brings in an added number of problems. We have more traffic congestion and deaths on the roads. We have more pollution of every sort. We have overcrowding and cheek by jowl existence and an urban shift from rural living. All these pressures add to short fuses, impatience and family disharmony amongst young people. So patience and subtlety are called for.

Leadership Training for University Entrants including Monks

The Government via the Ministry of Higher Education, has decreed that all University Entrants including Buddhist Monks who have also obtained entrance to the University, must undergo ‘Leadership Training’ prior to entrance. This was first instituted with much fanfare last year and was opposed by most student groups as being a means to perpetuate the current policy of containing freedom of thought by instilling values that are based on the governmental thinking rather than on reason and intelligence.

I blame the education system in Sri Lanka for not giving youth of Sri Lanka the tools to think, and all independent thought is suppressed even at the classroom level. Even school teachers shout down students who express an independent opinion, as being trouble makers!!

It is simply an extension of this system that the leadership training aims at achieving. One main aim was ostensibly to prevent University Students from joining the JVP led IUSF which is supposedly involved in the initiation rag to suppress any independence students may have into only their philosophy.

I do not believe three week training at an Army Camp can do that. In any case, whilst I subscribe to theory that inhumane humiliating initiation rights are wrong and must be banned, I do believe the students must in competition decide which student body represents their true interests. So if the leadership training is to instill Mahinda Chinthana policies on impressionable poorly educated youth, then it is plain wrong and an attempt at brainwashing.

Further I believe that training of any sort should not be conducted at Army camps that may have facilities but bear no relationship to the students learning process, and must be conducted by life skills advisers and NOT army personnel who are a further part of the mindless order takers who just repeat what is taught them, not being able to think for themselves.

It is important that if there is a conscious effort at instilling confidence and ability to think, it is done by life skills instructors. That philosophy however is anathema to the present regime as they will not be able to manipulate the minds of youth anymore.

Young people MUST understand that adults are forever in the business of wanting you to think their way not your way. You must reason and find your own path. It is how you do that which makes you strong and able to stand up for your rights. Let that be your primary goal.

In these circumstances when the 300 or so entrants to the University, who happen to be Buddhist monks, who may or may not go to Pirivena or Buddhist University education, have to undergo leadership training, it is to be held at either the Pali and Buddhist University at Homagama, or at the Buddhasrava Dhamma Faculty in Anuradhapura.

What was amusing was that the Secretary of the Minister of Higher Education has stated that the training would include ‘going in search of alms and meditation and day to day conduct’. For a servant of the state to make such utterances with a straight face itself, is a matter for amusement, not to be taken seriously. A monk worth his soul will learn from the elders at the Pirivena he is enrolled in to obtain his religious education about these aspects and does not require a three week leadership training course for that. It is more that they too require the basic life skills training that everyone else must undergo, due to the fact that all young people no matter what field they go into, must acquire basic knowledge.

It is even more important for Buddhist monks who are sheltered from day to day problems of living to be aware of the world around them, so that as part of their pastoral duties and ability to deliver sermons to the laity are fully aware of the conditions upon which they live and the daily trials and tribulations faced by the lesser mortals in our society.

If at all the life skills training is a vital part of the training of a Buddhist Samenera over the way to gather alms. After all the pinnapada route has changed somewhat from days of old, where traditionally every morning the village priest went in search of alms before he ate his midday meal. It hardly ever happens and the laity bring it to the temple instead, and there are many a story on what is prepared and how it is prepared. That is a whole different story not part of this topic.

It is important for young people to fight for what it rightfully theirs, in a way that does not prevent others from conducting their day to day activities, and inconvenience them. It is therefore necessary that students who enter University understand what it is they are entering, what is expected of them, and what they can expect from it, and not be fooled by the likes of Govt. or JVP unions to mislead them into entitlements they have not earned!!

Mixed Schools or Same Sex Schools is all about the ‘DIVIDE’

What divide is that? Have you not noticed that best in the league table of schools, the ones the Education Minister calls the 50 schools in the Country which out of  10,000the parents want to put their children into are ALL single sex schools.

I rest my case as far as the parents are concerned. I do not know whether this is because they just happen to be the main schools in Colombo together with the main schools in some of the larger cities in the Island, that have been endowed with a history of good teachers and facilities by both the Government, and by the original benefactors of the schools, be they individuals who built them or Religious Institutions which set them up. Either way they are some of the older established and recognized schools in the Country, many extremely large in size when compared with other schools in the country.

What do the students prefer? I for one a product of a single sex school, feel that it is better that way that there is no distraction at the early stages in life for anything other than studies or sports. Remember all sports anyway are divided by sex in all spheres including the international ones so that separation is the norm in that respect. It is also easier for the educators and those in charge to manage one sex. Just imagine on top of all the issues in schools they have to manage the interrelationships between males and females within the schools, that increases the responsibilities and therefore focus on education and discipline may compromise.

On the other hand the majority of secondary schools in the country are mixed, as well as the relatively recent international schools which also produce well rounded and socially capable youth who end up in the upper echelons of the private sector, many going overseas for higher studies.

The rural secondary students usually cannot even contemplate anything other than mixed schools as that is all they know. They usually have no choice. They go to the local schools at Montessori, which are mixed, as well as the Primary and Secondary which are both mixed schools. One outstanding feature in that set up is that of those who enter university from the mixed rural schools whose results due to the preference system are generally lower than the better urban schools, produce over 70% entrants who are female. This observation is generally not one that is known.

I offer a challenge with this statistic. It implies that Secondary, O level and A level system favors women, who either are more conscientious in their studies or are more mature age for age than their male counterparts, who are able at an earlier stage to set goals and keep to them. This resulting relative immaturity of male students is not addressed at the school level, and is just generalized as the boys being less interested in studies than girls.

That however if one looks at Royal vs Visakha the two leading and largest secondary schools in the country the same cannot be said. Is it because the elite of the country both in pupils and in teachers vie to get in to those schools? Or is it that they can focus without fear of sexist rivalry to concentrate on getting the results to get to the next stage?

A disturbing trait in rural areas is girls who are very young are married off or get married one way or another, when compared with urban areas.  Is this because they get familiar with the opposite sex at an early stage to form life long liaisons?  Is it to prevent a scandal? that pushes them into marriage which in a few years ends in divorce, or at the very least an unhappy marriage, where the spouse goes overseas to avoid the problem leaving a child or children in the care of others, that further results in social problems.

It is important to grapple with the issues and find a happy medium to solve this. This problem is NOT apparent at the Urban International Schools, as they are focused, through the sacrifice of paying parents on finishing Tertiary Education. Therefore they will not be pushed into or indulge in a relationships, the consequences of which are not unfamiliar.

The fact is the ills of our education system far exceed worrying about whether we should continue with mixed schools. There is no one advocating converting the single sex schools into mixed schools as both parents, students and faculty are generally content with their performance.

Given the fact that we have mixed schools and that the majority of the students in the this country have NO choice but to attend such schools, we in the overall plan for improving the quality of education in Sri Lanka must be mindful of this dimension and make allowances to make the mixed school model work to the best advantage of the pupil, using educational tools, that enhance scholarship, competition and focus on achieving standards that produce the future generation of citizens to contribute more fully to the economic productivity of the nation.

The madness of youth, I have covered all their other ills so far

In the previous entries there have been a litany of some of the typical shortcomings when interacting with youth and which youth must be aware of in their dealings with others to achieve their goals.

One major annoyance that has not so far been referred to is the madness they appear to have. It is not one to send them to the asylum. It is their infectious ability to annoy which many perceive as mad as it is out of all senses, namely insane!!

Youth do not realize this trait, and perceive it as only something done for light entertainment, jest or to annoy something or someone they have taken a particular interest in so doing, for a rational or irrational reason.

These events constitute dangerous ground and usually when combined with liquor consumption leads to catastrophe that was not intended when the first burst of youthful exuberance abounded! To know one’s boundaries is important. Youth often are not equipped with the tools to decide between reasonable and unreasonable behavior. This aspect of life is gained by experience, which many are not privileged to receive due to lack of parenting or lack of peer groups with whom they can compare.

It leads to severe social problems, and many of our ills with regard to robbery and theft, even grievous bodily harm arise out of these social problems caused by the lack of adult interaction in early life to show them by way of example, the good and bad of life.

The area covered here is pretty extensive and includes behavior caused but not limited to substance abuse, alcoholism etc. which is another whole story by itself, but comes within the purview of the subject of maddening behavior.

These traits can be corrected without delay by including these troubled youth in programs that they see as being of use to them. They can then be guided by mentors who they can establish trust with and hopefully give up these traits and return to a sense of normalcy that does not directly harm any segment of population who come across them. In a sense it is important to focus on juvenile delinquency in society and to have an integrated method of tackling it with the support of the community. 

The age versus experience conundrum

Young people are in a hurry. They cannot see why others appear to slow them down, purposefully they say. It is part of the impatience of youth and the coolness that comes with age. While it is a gross generalization, mature people are calmer, less prone to histrionics and consider their next move carefully, where years of experience have taught them the art of patience and sometimes procrastination, which can work in their favor.

Under these circumstances young people want quick results, but are not willing to make the effort required to achieve them. They have the advantage of new technology, that has relieved them of much of the tedious work older people had to engage in during their growing years. So mobile phones internet, lap tops, spell check have all made communication much easier, removing barriers to engaging in conversation with total strangers in far flung places using different means

They do not think about the lack of experience of the ways of the world. They are unaware of how little they know about human psychology. It is usually learned through experience dealing with different types of personalities. This handicap cannot be explained until experienced.

The resulting chasm creates a gulf of understanding between generations, leading to difficult relationships with parents who do not see things the way their kids do and vice versa. It is this lack of communication that creates much discord leading to misunderstanding which is very evident in Sri Lankan Universities as far as dealing with the faculty and the Vice Chancellor are concerned. The latter are more concerned about law and order, and ensuring that classes are not disrupted. They do not want trouble makers destroying University property and common amenities, whilst the students’ goals and aims are different. They see a conspiracy to keep them subjugated, not educated. They perceive it is the fault of the politically appointed heads, bent on imposing their political masters’ ideology on students who are radically socialist, something that is common in varying degrees all across the Globe. This is borne out of idealism, which converts into realism with age and responsibility.

It is therefore important for youth to understand that there are differences and to accommodate them fairly and only give vent to feelings when injustice overcomes reasonable behavior.

The perceived threat to the established order of youth in politics

It is now a fact of life that young people expect representation in elected office, especially in local government. In that regard there are rules within political parties to reserve a certain number of places to young men and women who represent a proportion of the population and who wish to have their opinions represented in an elected body.

If a person is successful in politics and is seen to be performing, then he has no fear from usurpers. However the established order today is to get into politics for the wrong reasons, and any threat to that position is put down with a direct hit that intimidates the young person from pursuing as a challenger, usually within the same party!

This is a constant threat to the established order, in Sri Lanka, and youth have now made a habit of pushing the envelope and facing this threat head on, sometimes intimidating seniors within the party. A good organization is also a threat and often young pretenders have a better organized team they are able to galvanize with little in the way of teasers of goodies, being fleet of foot and intimidating both at the same time.

I think it is an excellent proposition. This keeps the seniors on their toes, and keeps them active, not just resting of their laurels. This generational confrontation is good and healthy in politics as fresh faces providing the new blood to old causes are an integral part of an evolving political culture that is dynamic and intimidating at the same time.

The reality is that there is no keen competition, but an attempt to distance youth, by not including them in the political activities, by deliberately ignoring their existence and not inviting them into the fold. This exclusion has benefitted many youth, to go into the hearts of the people, by connecting with the electorate on simple identifiable policies, that directly affect the constituency, and not some hard to identify ideological difference that does not connect directly with the voter.

A fresh face is always a breath of fresh air, and I will encourage genuine young people who wish to make a difference to get into politics to fight for your principles and provide an alternative to the established order, by giving a new angle to the old issues, with the possibility of a solution based on a new outlook, when old theories do not hold water.

The excitement of a spur of the moment decision

A characteristic of youth as compared with older people who have been around and done that! is that young people have an in built desire for instant gratification that involves very little planning. Older folks plan their lives. Often this is out of necessity with family commitments, responsibility, keeping up with the Jones’s and ‘bills’ to pay.

It is important that youth understand that they are fortunate to be spontaneous. Yesterday I was at an event, and all the young people towards the end of the party decided to go bowling. All of them piled up into whoevers vehicle they could squeeze into and off they went. Remember however it is the adults who gave them the dough to do so!!! The mums and the dads plied them with the 1000 rupee notes, which the young thought nothing of taking without a word of thanks!

I quote one example of a spur of the moment decision, to illustrate my point, unless the reader is not clear on the point I am trying to make. It is important at a young age to know these are moments to savor to enjoy and make the most of. They do not return time and time again, and the older one gets, the more focused one is, it is more difficult to be unpredictable in an exciting way.

The caveat to the spontaneity is the maturity to know one’s boundaries. I am not advocating binge drinking that many engage in just to be blind drunk, or to leap of a bridge or anicut in a place one is not familiar with and possibly break one’s neck. It is the adults who must give proportion to the behavior by explaining responsibility at an early age to take charge or ownership of the decisions that one makes.

The ability of convincing whoever you want to join you in your mad escapade is also a sign of leadership, one that takes tact and persuasion. This leadership must be encouraged by parents to develop organizational skills. That is why gamesmanship is such an important part of growing up. In society one has to interact with all manner of people, including the most disagreeable ones if one is to survive and get one’s way. Learning this interaction at an early stage is a huge advantage, which many of the private schools and some of the leading state schools are able to inculcate, and which is one reason parents go to such desperate lengths to enter their children into these establishments which have a proven record. 

How about telling the truth for a change

I have alluded to the fact that it is quite normal to tell a bunch of white lies when one is trying to show off especially to one of the opposite sex when it comes to trying to earn respect or a reply or a date. However I wish to elicit comments on the lies that are told in the job hunt as to what is in the CV and other half truths at interviews.

I just the other day caught out an applicant just plain lying and asked her why she needed to lie as it did not affect whether she got the position or not and that it would have been much better to come clean and come out with the truth. This fear that the truth will somehow implicate needs to change. The least one could do is not say anything rather than implicate oneself by lying.

This added problem of having to deal with lies is also intertwined with the reliability issue that I have referred to before. This is all part of the character of a person, which is very important when it comes to getting a job without favors, and on merit. It must also give the person a lot of confidence to land something on merit, so that no one can hint at having helped them on their way, as some are wont to rub it in rather too often.

 This habitual cultural trait of lying to preserve one’s status, and not wanting to let the side down or even in some cases lying so as not to offend someone who is trying to help, does not lend itself to confidence on the part of the employer or superior. It is very important that one stands by principle unflinchingly and proceeds to elaborate from there.

The young are constantly reminded that they must tell the truth when they go to their weekly Sunday school classes and that telling any lies does not bring them any merit. However they clearly forget that the moment they leave the Sunday school, negating whatever they learn in the first place.

The practice of lying is so entrenched that those who deal with this problem all the time, do not expect the truth to be told, being very philosophical about that. They then try to ascertain the truth by cross examination, and by other tried and tested means if they are intent on hiring someone, despite knowing that all the facts as presented have to be cross checked for accuracy before relying on them.

Initiatives, ideas, enthusiasm to create and to think outside of the box

The fault of the education system regarding the issues raised above, hold back youth from getting ahead and venturing into the unknown. It is this unknown that I wish to elaborate on here.

What is the unknown? It is a space that no one has gone to before. It is a risk that may or may not work, but will only be found out if you actually go there. Life without risks is not life. However excitement of the unknown must accompany the journey, as otherwise one cannot benefit from this space and make full use of it.

I encourage youth to venture into this space. Most of you already have the security of a home to go to when in need. You are not alone in the world. You are not tied up with family and financial responsibility. It is only during this window of opportunity that you can take up this space and make a go of it. You will then have no regrets in the future that you did not take the opportunity afforded, as it does not come again, as your life will move on to the next phase.

So let us define this word SPACE and go find it, indulge in it, live it, wallow in it and most of all, enjoy it to the fullest. It is fleeting moment for most of us in our life’s journey. Think of the space as the great unknown. This is the time to think of something new, an idea perhaps which as the subject above shows is made up of many parts.

The word ‘think outside of the box’ is the most important message here. That is the hardest to do due to the spoon fed education that most receive. Therefore you find it difficult to envisage life outside the constraints you have been set, or set for yourself. So the initial stage of getting outside that framework and exploring the unknown with a fresh outlook, without the baggage of the framework. Change is a crucial part of this thought process, because if you cannot accept change you cannot think outside the box! Embrace change, look forward to change and make a change. It is those who change that succeed and it is all about being fulfilled. That fulfillment differs from person to person and therefore it does not matter what you do, as long as you enjoy doing whatever you have chosen to do.

Grab the “SPACE” afforded to you. Take a chance, think outside the box, make change to your life and explore an idea, before it is too late.

Overcoming fear and gaining confidence – a path to survival

I interviewed a girl who came with her father, and insisted on being inside the room, while I was talking to her to ascertain her skills. She was a graduate of Arts with an external degree from Kelaniya University that she received in 2009 and has since not held any job!

I told her I will give a month’s rigorous training in office procedures and Sinhala and English typing so that at the end of it she will have the confidence to get any office job she chooses by giving her the confidence to turn up at an interview and convince the interviewer that she was worthy of being hired. It was the confidence that was lacking in her.

I asked her to start the job there and then and she preferred to come in the morning. She called the next day that she would not come. Why would someone throw out a chance in a life time to become employable? That is the billion rupee challenge facing Sri Lankan youth today.

It is this attitude that prevents young people from getting employment. They want to be spoon-fed into a job. They cannot choose one on their own. They need to hold the hand of a father or mother and not take decisions on their own. They are frightened of a challenging position and been given tasks and responsibilities. What is with our youth today?

If only one knows the common misconception amongst young people. Experience is of utmost importance in getting a suitable job, and any offer of experience be it paid or unpaid should be pounced on by a person as a chance to rise up the employment ladder. That concept is missing amongst youth.

It is this challenge that many in rural schools face. Little wonder that Bandula Gunawardene said that of 10,000 schools everyone wants to get into just 49 schools. That is because it is just those schools that give the students the confidence to face any challenge! All other schools fail even in that, let alone the basic education sans private tuition, which should be the aim of any school in the island if it is to achieve the minimum goal as an educational institution worthy of that name.

We MUST change the mindset of youngsters and put them through unpaid internships as a matter of course to get them used to holding a job

Silence is Golden

I attended a Bana Gedera yesterday for the brother of a staff member and as is traditional the Buddhist Priest comes sharp at 7.30 and gives his bana for about 45minutes to an hour before he leaves, having been given a thank you in kind, and then the food is served for those present.

To a fault, the over 35s and the females were in one place listening to the Bana and the under 35’s mainly male, were outside the house, (the bana was being said in the living room) chattering away and as the night wore on got louder in their inter communication!

It was difficult to listen to what the Priest was saying with loud background chatter. This house did not have a loudspeaker for those outside to listen to the bana, so their chatter was audible. Usually a loudspeaker drowns out the chatter, so that those who want to listen can do so despite the noise, as the speaker system is loud.

In my opinion society does not discourage this behavior. In future when these young men get older we will inevitably have the chatter inside the bana room, leaving the priest no option but to castigate the flock who will in turn chase the priest away from the bana than the other way round.

This is an illustration as to the direction of our society. There is no commonsense as to right and wrong; what is duty and good behavior on behalf of the life of the person for whose bana we are attending, or towards his family who have sacrificed a lot to hold this event, as it is costly to feed 100 people, the kind of minimum gathering in a home for the 6^th day bana prior to the dana for the priests the following morning.

To this I should remind the readers of the inevitable mobile phone ring, which today is loud even for the SMS that people receive. They must have the decency to put these on silent or vibrate as it is very distracting for people at such events. They do not do it as society does not frown on it. The norms of society must change to discourage this practice.

For some unknown reason we seem to love unusual ring tones on mobile phones which are a further source of irritation, this when coupled with the insistence of people not to switch it off and answer all incoming calls leads to unnecessary annoyance to others and should be corrected.

Young need to organize themselves – if they do not wish interference

There is nothing that the young hate more than being told what to do by those older than themselves, especially when they cannot see the logic of that request. It is even more important that consideration is given to their feelings whenever they are tasked with assignments by others above their age group.

It is therefore best to gather a team of young people with the ability to organize and set a plan that they can implement, devoid of older interference. That way a youth idea or plan, executed by the youth is one that will provide them with a sense of achievement and also a sense of fulfillment of a job well done.

For youth to be independent they must have the tools to take control of their lives. There has to be leaders amongst their group who are able to organize, manage and fulfill all the expectations in order for people to feel that the task was properly executed. The youth need that attitude that they alone can and so they should be given the chance to prove they can achieve their given objectives.

We are organizing an important project, and we have given the youth the complete independence of managing it from start to finish. However as leadership is not something that comes naturally to our psyche, we have to guide them in taking control of the project by way of example and persuasion by instilling in them the confidence that they can take charge of the project without further help.

The poor level of education sometimes exasperates one from being able to explain that which is required as a skill, as most young people are of the mistaken opinion that they are sufficiently skilled to achieve ownership of a project. It is important that the adult supporter or sponsor is given a chance to show some of the pitfalls, so that they are not repeated due to the alliance of the youth groups to fight off mistaken impressions of what can be achieved.

Let us encourage entrepreneurship as well as the notion that failure is OK and is merely the path to ownership by way of experience in life. It will then stand the young person in good stead so that he may take the required chances in life to get from stage one to ten, within his venture. 

Nutrition – How to combat the perils of misinformation?

The most important fact that young people MUST be taught from school and parents is the art of healthy eating. It is not necessarily an expensive option, but nutrition is an important aspect of education that is overlooked.

It is important first as a young child to be given healthy food to eat. Few parents change their habits for their children, but it is an advisable option as young people must eat healthy food such as reed raw rice, as opposed to white polished rice that is the norm today, leading to a whole range of illnesses. On the same vein, eating leaves grown at home without the use of any pesticides is important as well as to eat less of sugar and more of locally grown indigenous legumes.

I do not believe in forcing anything down anyone, but I do believe an early start will make a lifetime of difference, as it is difficult to change your dietary habits later on in life, however much one accepts that one is not eating healthily. So the early parental involvement in this project not confined to youth but to much younger children is important.

At the youth stage young people are more aware of the rights and wrongs as so are able to understand the rationale which in early years is mere what the adults say as opposed to them being able to logically deduce the reasoning behind the admonishments to use less sugar.

As a country we are now at the risk of a series of non-communicable diseases. The worst of which are caused by alcohol, and cigarette and related cannabis and other ingestible drugs that youth are prone to partake in. It has now spread to the worrisome childhood diabetes that is brought about by too much starch consumption, especially of the refined varieties like flour, but more especially the sweet tooth Sri Lankans seem to be proud of.

Let it therefore be a telling lesson for kids that if they do not change their eating habits at a very early age to healthy food, they are more than likely to suffer badly with illness resulting from a bad diet and have to be on medication all their lives to control a situation which if they have been warned off earlier could have reduced their problem or eliminated it altogether. So parents and young people you have a joint effort at this. 

Reliability as part of discipline – an essential requirement

I was asked to help with find a job for a graduate applicant. He emailed me his CV and I told him there were many weaknesses there and asked him to update it. I am very busy finding it difficult to give one on one time to help these people and told him I will try and find some time help him correct it and also draft a cover letter for him once I was able to sit with him and find out exactly the type of job he is keen to get and suits him.

I gave him two opportunities to help him with his job find, and he did not take me up on it. How is one to help a person who does nothing to help his cause? There is no point asking for help, when the subject is missing.

This kind of unreliability is a hallmark of young people today. They seem to ask for the sun and do not even make an effort to understand that there must be a commitment on their part in the process of receiving assistance.

Schools certainly DO NOT teach the importance of keeping to a promise. Young people do not realize that to get anything there is a two way contract. There are so many jobs where the applicant has got the job, and then not turned up on the day for work. It makes a mockery of helping when they are not reliable, as it also affects the prospects of others who also seek help with employment.

Being reliable, and dependent are all part of a self discipline routine that young people must learn at an early age, so that they will be able in future to progress in anything they do. I fail to understand why this is such a problem in Sri Lanka, as I believe in other countries young people know what it takes to get and hold a job.

I do not believe a seminar or a workshop can infuse and induce youth to change direction, as it takes time. Parents are the first point of contact here and have to over a series of concerted effort over months if not years try and get this hardwired into the brains of their offspring, so that they can achieve their goals. With tuition being the only discipline and passing exams being the only requirement young people in Sri Lanka have lost sight of the priorities in life, it is these priorities that will make help an individual to excel in life and achieve their personal goals in good time.

The Relationship with parents – pertaining to matters of the heart

I cannot express more forcefully the importance, especially of girls who get taken in by the sweet talk that guys engage in especially at the start of a relationship. With Men from Mars and women from Venus, it is important to understand the psyche of the girl, which the young men seem to know. Time and again they get taken in by the pack of lies a young man tells the girl, so that he becomes her sole obsession.

Women are prone to invent stories about their suitor which is blown out of proportion from the initial idea put into their heads by the suitor. Within a few weeks she is hooked and nothing will stop her now.

It is then through some incident the parents find out, and all hell breaks loose. At that moment nine times out if ten, the girl is under age, that is under 18 and the boy is over 18. In fact though the girl is more mature than the guy in every way in the lying stakes it is the reverse, as boys learn the trick of lying to get the girl at a very early age, and perfect that practice to a fault so that their sweet talking ways hypnotize the girl.

It is only then that the parents realize that they have no relationship with their daughter in the affairs of the heart. By then it is too late!! The boys has already got it into her and the end result is the irreversible act.

This is therefore not just a warning to our young lasses to be wary of any guy wishing to pursue a friendship usually at the tuition classes the modus operandi being using the sms mode, but more especially to the parents to warn the child well in time before this happens to have her head on her shoulders and be prepared for the flattery, which is only that, to find the blind spot, first to hoodwink her to his way of storytelling which is all a pack of lies of the imagination.

The heart to heart with daughters of this matter is now important even at age 12 or 13 before they see boys for anything more than conners and rogues. They must realize that at the very least A levels are a minimum before they can get enmeshed in something they find hard to extricate from. It is too late when the affair is found out, when the father of the girl beats the hell out of the boy. The worst course of action, as the girl with feeling of guilt at her lover being wounded, takes the irrational decision to runaway with him, leaving the father and mother to rue the day, they were not able to simply explain the facts of life!!

Young people do not value time – except for the visionary few

In youth one of the indicators in Sri Lanka is the lack of appreciation that time is important. On the one hand the young person is running don’t know where don’t know for how long, but the young person does not realize how important time is as they feel time is on their side and they have plenty of time to get it done.

When people look at it that way I enlighten their minds about how William Pitt the younger was the Prime Minister of England at the age of 24. I see all these youth at 24 and they cannot live on their own let alone manage a job, education and life on their own.

Young people though exposed to new technology that has speeded their learning still seem far away from achieving their goals quickly. When I say that the majority of youth only graduate at the age of 25, when in many countries they graduate at 21, means they start with a 4 year handicap, enabling other graduates from overseas universities to overtake them in employment from day one. Remember that there is no minimum age to do the London A levels, whereas in Sri Lanka schools will try to delay you from sitting for them. If one is home schooled on the London A level syllabus one can even sit the A levels at age 16 and enter University at that age with no handicap graduating before 20.

Just think of the head start that the student has. There is some discussion of them not being mature, but I disagree as there are many in Sri Lanka who are still eating at home at the of 30 and who I would contend are more immature than the 16year old I referred to. That argument does not hold water.

I ask young people not to waste time, and do something useful earlier on, lest they will be left behind by younger more able people who nevertheless exist. I blame poor parenting for this, and therefore the young person must realize that they are part of this phenomenon and must take control of their lives and pursue their interests rather than wait for something to happen in their lives.

The importance of time and its passage cannot be overstressed. Only busy young people realize it, so try to occupy yourself all the time in something both interesting and useful at the same time. Fulfillment will result. 

It’s the lack of jobs stupid! – Or is it?

I am daily asked if I know of jobs for young people. There are thousands of people with different levels of skill who are looking for jobs. They have no idea what is available and how to get them. There is no proper channel other than asking friends and acquaintances if they know of any jobs. I cannot believe that in 2012 we are still trying to place people in the age old method of contacts!

It is important that we are able place people in employment by some kind of formal means whereby employers can find reliable people with the right qualifications without delay. In this day with all the technology at our disposal, if we are not able to find jobs that are already there and match skills with vacancies, what good is all the new technology?

Youth unemployment is the single most important issue for young people across the world, but more especially in Sri Lanka as we are about to face a crisis where our young people are turning to violence drugs and alcohol as a means to relieve their stresses of feeling inadequate without job prospects. This should not be allowed. We as a society owe it to them to do our utmost to get them on the right trajectory without delay. The younger you are the more productive you are. If you have the right education and now is when your brain function is at its highest, if you do not use it to the maximum you are only to blame for the mess.

My suggestion is a youth job bank to be set up by the youth for the youth. The adults are not going to do this out of the goodness of their hearts. They are only going to do it for themselves. I feel the job bank coordinators can make it pay as well as there is a huge amount of money involved in finding employment. We see that every day with the sums earned by overseas agents placing people in various overseas countries on a daily basis.

We must then be able to tell them as long as your information is correct and you are able to hold down a job, we CAN and we WILL find you a job. It is up to you to make the most of it. Do not concentrate on income at first, but on experience and being able to work with others. The rest will fall into place, when you know how to work. You can use that as the stepping stone to greater heights from that start.